Chapters three and four

Chapter Three

 In chapter three the author talks about the “flower box movement” which looks at poverty through the lense of aesthetics in that if poor people could just be neater and fix up the appearance of how they live, then the problem of poverty would disappear.  If everything looked good then people would be happier and have more hope for the future. 

 Conley then goes on to describe his parents.  He talks about his mom, Ellen, who has no concept of class but a keen awareness of race.  His father, Steve, came from a wealthy family and has the opposite perspective on race and class; he notices the nuisances of a person raised in wealth but does not consider race in the equation.  Conley then goes on to say his dad was often times unaware or oblivious while his mom saw things that were not there.

The way Conley describes his parents makes me think that even though alone they could be handicapped with these idiosyncrasies in New York City, together they probably made a great pair.  For example, Ellen was fearful enough about the environment that she encouraged her kids to develop a “street wise” mentality while living there.  Conversely, their dad was able to block out unpleasantness and remain calm and sensible even in difficult situations.

 Chapter Four

Chapter four starts off talking about the national Head Start program which is a federal program that offers breakfast, a snack and lunch five days a week during the school year to kids between the ages of 2-5.  Both Dalton Conley and his sister Alexandra are participants in this program and it’s here both children learn they are different from the majority of people they live with in that they are white, not black.

Dalton goes on to recount the story of Christmas at Head Start when everyone in Alexandra’s class got dolls.  The boys got black male Barbie dolls and the girls got black female Barbie dolls.  Panic broke out when all the girls in the class noticed Alexandra, the only white female in her class, got a white Barbie and the black female students rushed her for the doll because it was a “real” Barbie.  This unfortunate incident illustrates the media driven campaign at the time that only beautiful girls could be white, skinny and have large breasts and this message was not lost on the little black girls in the class. 

When my daughter Alyssa was five she wanted a Barbie doll.  At the time she had a short bob haircut and we searched and searched for a Barbie that had a hairstyle like her’s.  We never found one so rather than make her feel like only pretty girls had long blond hair, I found a Barbie and cut the hair like Alyssa’s.  Problem solved.

But this concept of what is beautiful is still being defined by the media and packaged in a similar way.  A beautiful woman is still considered to be someone that’s thin with long hair and large breasts when in reality beautiful women come in all shapes and sizes.